St. Neotian Fensign Readings

by Erial

March 2003

Hedgehog

This month ( according to this odd left sock and scattering of tree bark) someone you think you know quite well is going to start making snide remarks about your life style. Depending on how much caffeine you have consumed these comments will either reduce you to tears or inflame your inner sense of worth and indignation. This person is a feckless and unattractive Squirrel, by the way, with a chip on their shoulder and really bad dandruff. They should be squashed ruthlessly with your verbal superiority and wit. Show no mercy and take no prisoners. Lucky number 3, lucky stone quartz.

Badger

There is an oily slick and a few rusted oddments strewn on the bank. When was the last time you performed some maintenance work around your home, eh? Those little jobs that you are leaving till the weather gets better are not going to wait, my friend. In fact, every day you leave it, something is getting slightly worse. Now is the time to embark on some D.I.Y. and to enlist the aid of all those know it alls down the pub who are constantly harping on about major work they have performed in their own abodes. Leave the patronizing Lobster on his bar stool though.He is the kiss of death when it comes to home improvement, even if he comes across as an expert. Beware yellow wires and instructions in Japanese. 

Pigeon

I suggest that you buy some of those nice non-slip decals or even a rubber bath mat this month. Your tarn has a definite oily sheen and the 4th house is descending rapidly under Uranus which indicates that you will have an embarrassing incident whilst performing your daily ablutions. A slightly battered rubber ducky and a soggy bar of soap will be key to your downfall. While you are at it, the hygiene in there is a bit lax. May I suggest a bit more elbow grease and some commercial cleaning products? An old tooth brush will get that green slime from around the taps. Lucky number 3, lucky fruit orange.

Squirrel

Lyra is moving into the second house and Libra is rising on a cusp. Basically, it looks as though all your hard work and effort from last month is about to start paying dividends. However, a shallow and envious Fox is going to be trying their hardest to sabotage your plans and reap the rewards for themselves. Ask your friends and co-workers if they have visited the ST Neots Site and if they know what Fensign they are. Play it very casual and cool. The Fox in question, being totally self centered does not read the other signs anyway, and won't know it is a subtle trap. When this Fox betrays themselves ( they don't believe in that 
"puddle rubbish" anyway) you will know who you have to watch out for. Lucky vegetable onion, lucky body part; elbow.

Aardvark

A minor family squabble has the potential to get blown out of all proportion this month if you don't stick to your guns and stop dithering over which version you believe. A bent coat hanger shows this quite plainly. A feisty Fox and an obstinate Owl are going to go head to head over something quite silly and foolish, but knowing your family ( and we both do) you know how quickly this will escalate into all out, no holds barred, war. Pick your words carefully, choose your moment cautiously and then lay down the law in no uncertain terms. They will all be so shocked by your passionate and well rehearsed outburst that their issue should become secondary to their concern as to your mental well being. Lucky color red, lucky animal bull.

Deer

Little buds and fresh green leaves garland your pool this month. It has a effervescent quality and is quite clear and receptive, unlike the other tarns which resemble nothing more than mud holes at this moment in time. A much younger and highly fanciable Pigeon is going to start casting "come hither" glances in your direction, which will leave you feeling very hot and bothered. At first, you will have doubts and will think you are mistaken as to their intentions, but pretty soon you will have solid proof that you are the object of their desires. Yes, it is an ego boost but to even think of taking this to another level ( except for in your fertile imagination) could be disasterous. Leave well alone! Lucky stone garnet, lucky time; 8.15 ( a.m. or p.m.) 

Lobster

There is a lank and limp quality to your puddle with half a shoe lace and a half submerged copy of some fashion editorial. Beware!! This month all the portents are screaming " Fashion accident!" and I strongly suggest that you stick to those tried and tested mix and match items in your wardrobe rather than suddenly deciding that you want to update to a trendier look. This is not a time when your brain will be able to discern things in the lower and upper color spectrum ( strange, but it happens) and you should avoid any wild urges to splurge on new clothing. Avoid the well meaning advice of a younger and much thinner Beaver Beast who does Pilates. They also are in the color doldrums, but on them, who would notice? Stick to being a frump for the time being and save your cash. Lucky color beige, lucky car Escort.

Woodpecker

Your pool is very cluttered and untidy with debris on the banks and a silty texture. However, there is a clear spot over in the 3rd house and I can see Leo rising ( just over there, by the beer bottle, see it?) Life has been very muddled for you here recently, but this month promises to be a good one, with many old issues and worries finally cleared from your mind. I see some good news coming in the post and also a minor health problems is finally going to clear up. Now might be a good time to start a new hobby or to undertake something you have been meaning to try for a while. Money-wise, you are going to achieve an even keel status, which doesn't mean you will be rolling in it, but will mean you can treat yourself occasionally without feeling guilty. Lucky flower; tulip, lucky body part; ears.

Owl

Can't seem to see round the tree limb which has fallen across your tarn. Obviously this doesn't bode well for the reading, but I will try. Either, ( and remember these are calculated guess-timates here, not something you want to try at home without adult supervision) you are going to be incredibly clumsy and the epicenter of any major accidents in the area ( might even make the news!) or you are going to be suddenly struck down with a rare form of narcolepsy. Either way, I suggest some added coverage on your insurance plan and a good thick layer of clothing for protection. Knee and elbow pads would be a plus. Lucky stone; gall, lucky day Tuesday.

Fox

Fate is going to play a big role in your life this coming month. You will think all these little incidences in your life are mere coincidences, but they are actually something stronger and much more interesting. May I suggest that you act on your crazy impulses and get yourself out of the rut you have dug for yourself? It certainly won't hurt to be a bit impulsive for a while and the Fates are defiantly on your side for this cycle. A social outing that you had been thinking about declining would prove to be an interesting experience, so stop being an old stick-in-the-mud and live dangerously for once. Oh, and don't forget to pack your toothbrush..........Lucky area, Eaton Socon, lucky tree; birch.

Toad

A tall dark stranger will be entering your social circle, someone brooding who looks to have depth and untapped layers to their psyche. You will feel compelled to befriend this outsider and bring them into your life. Beware! I can see by these duck droppings and smattering of lichens that this person is nothing more than what they appear to be. Tall, dark and brooding sums it up, there is no "hidden layer" underneath and you would be wasting your time to go searching for it. Take them as face value and you wont be disappointed. Beware of cats with one ear and little men selling cheap electronics. 

Weasle

This month is going to be a frustrating one for you, but only if you refuse to see the deeper meaning behind the apparently random series of events that are coming up. Like the Fox, Fate is smiling on you, but in an obscure and sometimes maddening fashion. Nothing you leave will stay where you KNOW you put it. Car keys, shoes, your money, even where you parked the car, will lead you to think you are losing your marbles ( where did you put those marbles, by the way?) Be assured that these are just attempts to make you focus on the real issues in your life. Blue is defiantly your color this month and your lucky number is 7. 

Beaver Beast

Why are you bothering, eh? These seemingly random and meaningless patterns in the silt of your tarn indicate that you are just throwing good money after bad. There comes a time when even you have to realize that the only ones getting rich in these "Get Rich" schemes are the people who start them. Chain letters are so passť these days. I advise you to shred them all up and be done with it. Take the money you put in the envelopes out of the envelopes first though ( duh!!) Also, avoid the financial advice of a boisterous Hedgehog called Big Larry who drinks in your local. This individual is not to be trusted and knows nothing about insider trading. Lucky animal; chicken, lucky planet; Mars.

 

Erial may be contacted at erial@st-neots.co.uk

 

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